It was a product of the Transcendentalist movement, and was intended to be part park and part cemetery.  If you’re able to visit it, this will make sense, because it is beautiful—I’m very glad a friend of mine talked me into going.

I only saw a tiny corner of the place, and I plan on going back sometime this summer. In the meanwhile, here are some of the pics I took.

For those keeping score at home, these were shot with a Nikon D70 with an 85mm f/1.4 lens.

WARNING: There are spoilers galore for The Game of Thrones, The Song of Ice and Fire, and even The Lord of The Rings contained herein. Read at your own peril.

Update: I added a little section on Jeyne Westerling. As noted above, don’t read it if you don’t want spoilers!

The Game of Thrones is dead. The TV show, I mean. It’s dead to me. It’s become a big pile of poop interspersed with gleaming nuggets of gold.

Oh, I loved the first season, which tracked the titular first novel, The Game of Thrones, of The Song of Ice and Fire series by George R. R. Martin. It was gorgeous, and beautifully created. The actors were mostly wonderful, and when the producers made changes to the source material, those changes made sense and were understandable.

Season two, which roughly tracks the second book in the series, A Clash of Kings, has introduced a variety of changes to the source material that do not make sense.

Why Is This Happening?

Let me explain: It’s not change that is putting me on tilt, it’s stupid changes. I am fully cognizant of the need to make changes when making a book into a movie or TV show. Sometimes there are things that are just perfect for the written word that utterly fail on the screen. A good producer/writer/director/editor team’s job is to fix those things, to make the story be as good as it can be on the big or small screen.

I get that.

For instance, let’s look at another adaptation, The Lord of the Rings. In the books, there is a seventeen year gap between The Party in The Fellowship of the Rings and the day that Frodo, Sam, Merry, and Pippin set off for Rivendell. Seventeen years.

In the movie, the lads set off the next day.

Who cares? It’s a needless complication for the movie, even though it worked well in the books, and despite the fact that it included another complication.

When Frodo left The Shire in the books, he was 51, though being longer lived that humans he would have looked about 35ish. In the movie, Frodo is young, he’s a teenager.

Now, I do have a little bit of a problem with that—there’s a lot about the relationship between Sam and Frodo that simply didn’t work with a young Elijah Wood and the older Sean Astin (loved them both, mind you!), but the reality is that a young hero is way easier to market than a middle-aged hero, and the whole seventeen year wait is just a needless complication when it came to the movie.

So I didn’t mind this change, even though it was kind of big thing for a Tolkien nut like me.

Skipping Tom Bombadil? Hey, I think that Tom was a big, big deal in the books, and I loved his part of the story. I loved Gandalf explaining that Tom might take custody of the Ring, but that if he did, he’d end up forgetting about it. Tom trashing the wights?! Good stuff!

But man, what a pain in the ass segment to film, and it would just leave a lot of audience members confused. I totally get axing it!

Making Arwen’s role 10,000% bigger than it was in the books? I get it! Tolkien wrote in a different time, and he lived in a man’s world. Having a hot chick is usually a good thing for movie audiences, and it was certainly smart to give female viewers something to better identify with. Again, I get it!

There were other things, like making Elrond into an angry and not very smart dude that I would have done differently, but in the grand scheme of things, it’s no biggee. I also frowned at having a bunch of elves show up at the Battle of Helm’s Deep, but whatever.

Where I flipped my wig in watching these movies was in stupid changes and changes that fundamentally altered important characters.

For the stupid, we have the LSD trip that Aragorn had in The Two Towers. You know, the one where he got separated from the party and wound up on some bluff…I’ve blocked the details from my mind, but my point is that it wasn’t in the books.

In that so many little things had to be cut from the story for the sake of time, I simply can’t understand why this crappy scene was added. It didn’t advance the story, it didn’t better tell the story on the silver screen, and it didn’t even give us exposition that we somehow needed.

That was bad enough, but it was what was done to Faramir that ruined the boos for me. Let me start with Faramir’s role in the books. Faramir was sort of a stand in for The Way Things Were. You see, Tolkien thought that once upon a time things were better.

We saw this throughout the books. The Elves used to be awesome, but had faded. Men (with a capital “M”) used to be badass, but they had faded, having interbred with too many ordinary men (small “m”). All of his empires and kingdoms used to be super powerful, but in the Third Age, they were all faded remnants of the powers of old.

Faramir was a stand-in for the Men of old. He reminded you of Aragorn, and maybe a little of Gandalf. Even his father, Denethor, reminded Pippin of Gandalf.

In Faramir, the Numenorean blood of Men ran truer than it did in his contemporaries. He was a scholar, and a reluctant warrior. He found when he had to, not for the love of battle.

His brother, Boromir, was a man’s man. Note the lower case “m” there. Boromir reminded you of the Rohirrim, at best, but he most definitely was not an Aragorn or Gandalf, no sir. And he loved to fight. He had no time for scholarship, but he could swing a sword like nobody’s business.

These contrasts were drawn again and again for us, and in the end, there were two things that separated these two brothers, and that separation was extraordinarily symbolic. Boromir was seduced by the ring from the moment he saw it in the Council of Elrond. He began coveting it immediately, and he eventually tried to take it from Frodo by force.

This was an expression of Tolkien’s loathing of Things Modern and his disdain for what he saw around him.

Faramir, on the other hand, did the opposite. Here he was in Ithilien on his pop’s orders looking for anyone trying to make their way to Mordor. He was to stop them and make sure to bring anything they might have on them to said pop.

And lo! Frodo waltzes right into his hands, and rather than being seduced by the power of the Ring, he does the right thing. He lets Frodo go, pats him on the butt, and shows him the way out of Ithilien into Mordor.

Why? Because he was a throwback to the Numenoreans of old. Since his Numenorean blood ran truer than that of his brother, he was able to make the right call and do the right thing.

At least that’s how it happened in the books.

In the movie, Frodo waltzes into Faramir’s hands and Faramir marches him towards Minis Tirith, taking Frodo and Sam in the opposite direction they needed to travel in the process. He doesn’t let him go until after they are attacked by the Nazgûl at Osgiliath (that battle with the Nazgûl at Osgiliath took place in the books—without Frodo or Sam—but it happened off camera).

So in one fell swoop, the movie betrayed the very symbolic role that Faramir played in the books, took Frodo and Sam many miles out of their way, and added a long, draw-out scene that made it necessary to cut other things out of the story.

It didn’t make the movie better, it didn’t better tell the story for the silver screen, and it added unnecessary scenes, all while fundamentally adulterating not only a character’s character, but even one of the major underlying themes of the story (Old Good, New Bad).

I am very aware that most people don’t care enough about any of this to get so worked up about such things, but I do.

Getting back to Game of Thrones, the TV show, in season two, the producers have begun making wholesale changes to the story line that are stupid and/or unnecessary, and it’s gotten so bad that I find myself losing interest.

Roz the Whore with a Heart: Who gives a flying fuck about this character? I’m sick of this wholly added character getting any screen time when so many other characters have been cut from the show altogether (Cressen, anyone?)

Petyr Baelish Hanging out Catelyn Stark at Renly’s Camp: Why is he here? How does having be at this place make the show any better? In the books, he’s off camera at the Eerie seducing Lysa Arryn. I wouldn’t mind seeing those scenes, but I don’t see how having him NOT seduce Lysa while unnecessarily complicating the scenes with Renly.

Craster Smashing Jon Snow’s Head: Why? I get that they wanted to make sure we understood that boy babies get sacrificed to the others—something we learn through exposition in the books—but learning through exposition would have worked just as well on the show.

STOP KILLING DANY’S BLOODRIDERS! Why did one of Daenerys’s Bloodriders die in the first ep of season two? These three characters play important roles in the books going forward, if Roz is going to get one second of screen time, there is simply no excuse for killing these characters.

Where the Fuck Are Meera & Joren Reed? I’ll confess that I missed “The Old Gods and the New” and “The Ghost of Harrenhal” before watching “A Man Without Honour” tonight. So you can imagine my surprise to learn that Osha masterminded the escape of Bran and Rickon from Winterfell, and that Meera and Joren Reed never showed up. These two are very, very important to Bran’s story line, and I can not imagine his tale being told without him (in a credible way). It’s not too late. They could certainly show up and talk their way into Osha’s confidence, but again, ROZ IS GETTING SCREEN TIME!?!

Stannis Baratheon’s Daughter: In the show, Stannis is childless, and the Red Woman is screwing him on camera, rather than it merely being hinted at in the books. Because GoT is contractually obligated to show 100 boobs per episode, I get the on-camera sex stuff, but I’d rather Shireen be mentioned and not seen than axes altogether. Really, this is probably one of those minor changes, but when added to the great big pile of other changes, it annoys me.

The Courtship of Jon and Ygritte: In “A Man Without Honour,” Ygritte and Jon Snow hang out for a long time and have this long cock tease banter. Seeing as how it already changes the way Jon Snow kills Qhorin Half Hand, I am not looking forward to the bastardization of that remarkable scene that lies in front of us. My assumption is that rather than Ygritte playing witness to that event, she will somehow be instrumental in it. We’ll see…

Jeyne Westerling Transformed Into a “Foreign” Florence Nightingale: If you haven’t read the books and are watching the show, don’t read this one.

In the books, Robb Stark goes off on brilliant campaign in the Lannister’s backyard. During that campaign, he gets wounded and is cared for by the Westerlings, a minor noble family under the Lannisters. Their young, nubile, and delightfully cute daughter, Jeyne, becomes his nurse, and well…one thing leads to another, and boom! Robb Stark and Jeyne fall in love, there’s some (off-camera) sex, and what’s a young Lord Stark to do? Well, if you’re a Stark who was raised to be honorable by a man whose own reputation was tarnished by (allegedly) cheating on his wife and siring a bastard, you marry the girl.

The beauty of this subplot is how it unfolds. Jeyne Westerling was cleverly used by Tywin Lannister and her own parents to unravel Robb’s fragile alliances, and his eventual betrayal is heart wrenching, devastating, infuriating, and tragic.

In the show, this character has been transformed into some kind of foreign Florence Nightingale. We know she’s foreign, because some Northerner yells something about her being “that foreign bitch.” There’s no doubt that the show will be able to use her to orchestrate Robb’s demise, but it will not have the tragic undertones of Jeyne Westerling and her little brothers’ devotion to Robb. It won’t show Tywin’s utter brilliance. It will not represent an improvement to the story.

Someone Took the Dragons? This was it. This was the moment I literally threw my hands up in the air and gave up on the show. Dany’s three dragonlings have been taken. Why? Why change this? How in the world does this make a better show or a better story? And then 12 (or 11) of the 13 are killed by Xaro Xhoan Daxos—the King of Qarth?!?!?!—and his allies The Undying?

I personally find the power struggles between The Thirteen, the Tourmaline Brotherhood, and the Ancient Guild of Spicers as reason why no one tried to steal the dragons far more compelling than the Undying simply taking them. Xaro’s long efforts to get Dany to marry him—despite his lack of interest in women—so that he can claim one dragon as a wedding gift to be very intriguing.

Perhaps it’s just too much story to make work on-screen, or perhaps there were other issues, but again, with Roz getting screen time, this shit just isn’t worth it.

There have been many, many other changes that set me off, this list was merely the things I could remember off the top of my head.

One more point: I don’t hate change, per se, and rightly or wrongly I think that different books should get treated differently. Take my own book, which I’m shopping to agents now. It’s good, but it’s no A Song of Ice and Fire. If I am lucky enough to sell this book, and then insanely lucky enough to sell the movie rights, and then bizarrely luck enough to have someone actually make a movie from it, I would expect all manner of things to get changed.

But there are other books, like Harry Potter, The Lord of the Rings, A Song of Ice and Fire, Dune, and even Stranger in a Strange Land, where the stories are so iconic, so beloved, and so strong that filmmakers should only make changes when those changes are absolutely necessary.

Many times, such changes might be frequent (as I said, there are all kinds of changes in The Lord of the Rings and Game of Thrones that I am OK with—some of them I’d even characterize as brilliant). When you start fundamentally altering the story itself, major themes in the story, and even the fundamental nature of characters, I’d rather just not watch.

I love George R. R. Martin’s story, and I think I’ll stick to its written form from now on. At best, the TV series has become one of those things I turn on in the background when I’m working rather than a show I sit down with and focus on.

There’s a lot to love about the TV show. It’s still gorgeous, it still has amazing actors, and if you haven’t read the books, none of the things I’m whining about matter. If you’re like me—I’ve spent countless hours trying to divine who Jon Snow’s mother is and I think I’ve got it; ask me privately if you want my thoughts—all of the unnecessary changes overshadow the great stuff.

In 2009, Darla and I had to put down Chandler Bing, my (he had become our) Yellow Lab. A couple of months later, Darla and I divorced. The Country Music Standards & Essentials Bureau contacted me shortly thereafter letting me know my life was officially eligible to be a bad country song with the proviso that it would behoove me should anything happen to my car within a 90-day period.

Chandler Bing (& Yellow Wiener Dog) in 2008. R.I.P., Mr. Bing! We Miss You!

Let It Burn, by The Atomic Love Bombs

In 2009, The Atomic Love Bombs released our first CD, Let It Burn. It is a great album, and I was proud  to be a part of it. In 2010, I left the band. We were working on some great songs—Joe’s an amazing songwriter—and you can hear one of them, “Sol Invictus,” on the band’s Facebook page. It’s a great song and hopefully they will record more.

In theory, I’m working on a solo project. Though it might be something I do with friends around the country. I’ve been writing songs for the project, but recording it is awaiting time and access to a studio. Perhaps in the next year…

In 2010, I contributed to iPad All-In-One for Dummies (I wrote the book-within-a-book on apps for the first edition) by Nancy Muir, and co-wrote Incredible iPad Apps for Dummies with Bob “Dr. Mac” LeVitus.

In 2011, I let myself look like this:

Bryan in 2011

I know, it’s hard to tell if I’m a professor at U.C. Berkeley, or the homeless guy going through his garbage.

In 2011, online poker vanished in a puff of zealous DA (with a side whiff of FullTilt corruption), leaving me with a lot of time on my hand. So, I started a SciFi novel two weeks after Black Friday. It’s untitled, but it is essentially finished and in the hands of my beta readers. I’m beginning the process of finding an agent, though I am also toying with the idea of self-publishing. I’ll be posting more on this as we go.

Speaking of beta readers, I have some amazing friends, and have been introduced to some more amazing people. They have been instrumental in me getting even this far, and their encouragement played a major role in me pushing forward on writing it.

As it is, I am doing a final round of edits (before a publishing editor rips it to shreds and I have to do it all over again). I’ve also outlined and started writing book two (it’s a two-part series).

Which is why I am relaunching my personal site, GeekTells. Julie Kuehl helped me update WordPress and install this new theme from Back My Book.  Thanks, Julie!

‘Sploding Poker image courtesy of Shutterstock.

Anyway, I started off with chicken korma, because, you know, it was way above my cooking ability. Fortunately it worked out despite my lack of skills.

So for the second week, I went for The Pioneer Woman’s awesome Pork Chops with Apples & Creamy Bacon Cheese Grits.

This was an amazing dish, and the folks I was cooking for really enjoyed it. Better yet, I enjoyed it!

If you didn’t click through to the recipe, the grist are Charleston Grist ($17.99 at Amazon(!!)), which are amazing. They’re cooking with chicken broth, cream, bacon, and onions. I mean, come on!

The pork chops are cooked with apples, wine, a little vinegar, and maple syrup. Super tasty!

I’d cook either meal for a date (the korma or this meal), but I think this one might score some real points.

Book Description:

The popularity of the iPad is growing at an unstoppable rate and users are looking for help sorting through the tens of thousands of apps available in the App Store. Packed with helpful reviews and valuable tips on how to make the most of each app, this book walks you through the vast selection of apps and helps you narrow down the most essential and entertaining apps for your needs and interests. Mac guru Bob “Dr. Mac” LeVitus helps you uncover the best of the best apps in business, education, entertainment, finance, health, fitness, games, news, music, sports, weather, and more.

The ins and outs of all things iPad and iPad 2—in full color!

Packed with the power of a MacBook, iPod touch, eReader, digital camera, portable game console and so much more, the iPad is an awesome device. And, the business world has certainly taken notice. The iPad is moving into the enterprise where power users and professionals alike are using the device to increase their productivity and work smarter at the office and on the go.

Long-time For Dummies author Nancy Muir walks you through the latest functions, features, and capabilities of the iPad and iPad 2 in six easy-to-understand minibooks covering setting up and synching your iPad; using the iWork applications; printing from your iPad; managing your contacts and calendar; accessing your e-mail and the web; making FaceTime video calls; using your iPad as a presentation tool; and finding the best apps for travel, news, weather, finances, and business productivity.

• Six full-color minibooks include: iPad Basics, Just for Fun, iPad on the Go, Getting Productive with iWork, Using iPad to Get Organized, and Must-Have iPad Apps
• Covers the newest iPad 2 features including FaceTime, Photo Booth, Smart Covers, HD video and cameras, video mirroring, and HDMI output
• Shows you how to use iWork and other productivity apps to dress up your documents, create stellar spreadsheets, add pizzazz to your presentations, and maintain your schedule on the run
• Walks you through connecting with WiFi and 3G; using Maps for directions and places to stay when you’re away from the office; keeping in touch with e-mail and social networking; and using your iPad as a remote desktop while you’re on the road
• Includes information on having a little fun, too, with tips on loading your iPad or iPad 2 with music, movies, photos, e-books, games, apps, and more

Filled with no-nonsense basics and slick and savvy tips, iPad All-in-One For Dummies, Second Edition is the best accessory you’ll ever buy for your iPad or iPad 2!

Book Description:

A full-color directory of must-have iPhone and iPod touch apps!

The App Store allows you to browse and download thousands of applications that were developed with the iPhone SDK and published through Apple. The popularity of iPhone and iPod touch apps is exploding and this handy guide helps you sort through the tens of thousands of available apps so you can find the ones that are ideal for you.

Packed with tips and tricks on how to make the most of each app, this book escorts you through a vast selection of apps and then helps you narrow down the most essential and most entertaining apps for your needs and interests. You’ll encounter amazing apps in business, education, entertainment, finance, cooking, nutrition, games, healthcare, news, music, social networking, news, weather, and more.

• Helps you sort through the tens of thousands of available apps for the iPhone andiPod touch so you can find what’s right for you
• Shares unique tips and tricks for making the most of the apps that appeal to you
• Shows you a variety of apps in the fields of weather, news, photography, cooking, entertainment, business, education, healthcare, social networking, sports, and more
• Presents information in the straightforward but fun language that defines the For Dummies series

With Incredible iPhone Apps For Dummies, you’ll discover how to have fun, get more done, and make the most of your iPhone or iPod touch.

Book Description:

Get ready to rock with Apple’s digital music recording studio

Find out how to record, edit, mix, and master like a pro!

Are you the next big thing in music – but the world just doesn’t know it yet? Here’s the guide that will help you create great-sounding recordings with GarageBand. Packed with useful information on setting up a digital studio, laying down tracks, working with loops, playing with MIDI and software instruments, and mixing tracks, the only thing this book doesn’t provide you with is . . . a recording contract!

The Dummies Way

• Explanations in plain English
• “Get in, get out” information
• Icons and other navigational aids
• Tear-out cheat sheet
• Top ten lists
• A dash of humor and fun

Discover how to:

• Decide what gear you’ll need
• Optimize your room for recording
• Mix vocals, instruments, and loops into a song
• Improve recordings with editing and effects
• Create CDs, movie scores, and more using other iLife applications